Parenting

Do You Struggle To Keep The Peace Or Connect With Your Child?

Are you raising children while juggling many obligations and responsibilities? Has a negative relationship with one or both of your parents impacted the way you raise your own kids? Do you find it challenging to maintain effective communication and mutual respect with your children? 

Perhaps you are struggling to balance other obligations with precious family time. Or maybe you are caught up in cycles of conflict or communication breakdowns with your children. If you had adverse experiences with your own parents growing up, you may be at odds about how to approach certain issues that come up as you navigate the delicate terrain of the world of parenting. 

Unfortunately, if left ignored, mounting tension with your children can have negative consequences for everyone in your family. Symptoms of depression or anxiety may arise in both parents and children, or you may begin to notice detrimental behaviors impacting your child’s ability to perform in school or maintain positive relationships with his or her peers. 

While you may feel a budding disconnect from your child, it does not have to prevent you from fostering the healthy relationship you want with them. Parenting presents a dynamic set of challenges that change as kids grow older, but counseling is available to help you reconcile the issues that come up, regardless of what age your child(ren) may be. 

Many Of Us Grapple With The Ever-Changing Pressures Of Parenthood

Conflict and disagreement within families is extremely common and communication obstacles occur in just about every single family. 

As modern parents today, there is a lot of pressure on us to make up for the lack we might have felt in relationships with our own parents, if they were distant, or to match the quality of parenting they maintained, if they were strong role models for us. Fathers, especially, are redefining the concept of fatherhood by taking more active roles in their children’s lives than what we have seen in generations past. In general, we are seeing a cultural shift that places more emphasis on the home and family than on work and other obligations. 

The bar is getting raised with each successive generation in what is expected from parents, and this is happening in conjunction with a rise in technology that is constantly placing us in front of our screens and exposing us to snapshots of the “perfect” families on social media. While it’s a positive thing that a shift in priority from work to family is taking place, we remain at risk of moving away from the pleasures of simply being present with our family and getting to know our children as more than just extensions of ourselves. 

Moreover, with more family time inevitably comes more conflict. As with any relationship, it can be difficult to be constantly interacting and engaging with our kids, and they likely feel the same way with us. It’s important to strike a balance between meaningful and positive family time and taking care of the needs of the individuals within the family unit. 

Parenting is hard! But with the guidance of a coach, counselor, or therapist, you can learn how to shift your thinking about the stress and pressures of parenting so that you can have a new perspective and a more harmonious family life.  

Counseling Can Help You To Improve Your Parenting Communication Style

While your time may be stretched thin as a parent, therapy gives you the opportunity each week to have a break that is specifically designated for you and your needs. If you are looking to vent some of your frustrations about certain aspects of parenting, or if you’re simply looking to gain a new perspective about an ongoing conflict with your child, counseling is an ideal context for exploring these challenges in an unbiased and supportive atmosphere. 

Honesty is welcomed in this environment. And as a mental health expert and father of four, I can offer you a unique perspective.

In our counseling sessions, we will explore the struggles you have as a parent and work to better understand where your child may be coming from. Using my background in child developmental psychology, I will help you learn how your kid’s brain is progressing and functioning. In doing this, you will have a better grasp on their understanding of a variety of situations and their reaction to them. It can be incredibly helpful to have access to your child’s point of view as you are navigating your relationship with them. 

From there, we will identify the core of the issues between you and your child, which are often related to disparities in communication. Along the way, you may also gain a newfound understanding of your own development as a child and the factors that either helped or hindered your growth at a young age. You will leave counseling sessions with a clearer view of your parenting style and what you can do to reduce conflict within the family, allowing you to have cherished and meaningful experiences with your kids. 

I can’t reiterate enough how difficult parenting can be, and I am confident that the vast majority of parents are doing the best they can with and for their children. I can say, from my own experience as a dad and having counseled many parents during my career, that we are often doing better than what we were shown as children, however well-intentioned our parents might have been. 

The parent-child dynamic is experiencing a cultural change, and we are at the forefront of that shift. The adjustment may be challenging, but it is paving the way for a bright future for our families and our children as individuals. If, at the end of the day, you are parenting from a place of love rather than a place of heightened emotion or reaction, you will be successful as a parent. Let me help you get to that place!

Perhaps you are considering counseling to address some parenting issues, but you have some concerns…

Given that I am parenting a young child, it’s very difficult for me to find the time to commit to therapy.

I think especially if you are a new parent or a parent to young children, it is essential to find time for yourself to commit to therapy or coaching. Carving out time for yourself each week will not only help you to navigate challenging situations within your family but also give you the opportunity to have time that belongs to you. Counseling is an investment, and if it can help you and your parenting techniques in the long run, it is time well spent. 

If I am having communication or conflict issues with my child, is it necessary for the other parent to be in session with us?

No. Most of the counseling I do is in an individual context, and I approach parenting issues in session with a tailored perspective according to the needs of the client. 

How long does parenting counseling take?

This really does vary from client to client, depending on a number of factors. Each family has different needs and each parent-child relationship has a unique set of circumstances and dynamics. I will say, however, that counseling for parenting specifically tends to be somewhat shorter and more succinct than the treatment process for broader issues like anxiety or depression. Regardless of the time it takes, I am confident that counseling is an investment in your relationship with your child, and it will pay off in the form of a happy, healthy interpersonal dynamic. 

You Can Reclaim Your Relationship With Your Child

If you are doubting that your parenting approach is working, or if you’re struggling to connect with your child, counseling can help you to gain new perspectives and techniques for resolution. For a free, 15-minute consultation to discuss how I can help you may contact me here.

Please note that due to COVID-19, I am conducting all sessions online for the time being.

Blog